Kitchen Light

The kitchen light's still on
And I'm staring at the ceiling
Why, this is another sleepless night
With things swimming around in my head

It's just me in bed and my earphones
Toss the Feathers is beating off my ears
This is hardly the first time
In the dark with only the kitchen glowing

They say everything happens for a reason
But in nights like this I try to find the reason why
For every abyss I have entered in my eighteen years
As a toddler I only imagined bright lights
But I got slammed hard and hard out of expectations
My sole question is why it should've been me
Why it couldn't have been someone else in this whole wide world
And somehow I never lose my little faith
That He Who Knows Best wants me to be strong

The kitchen light's still on
And I'm feeling the cold night wind
Yeah I'm used to this kind of night
When for some reason I just can't close my eyes

They say you are strong, you are tough
But in nights like this I feel the deepest of my vulnerability
With wounds from battles I've fought in the past
When I was a child happiness was all I knew
But then I got hurt years again years again
There were days of me almost losing it
There were days of me thinking everything was black
But somehow I never lose my little faith
That He Who Knows Best loves me anyway

It's just me in my bed and my earphones
Only When I Sleep is drifting along
Well only when I sleep I ever feel peace
Deep beneath a dark world of slumber

The kitchen light's still on
As if telling me there is always something to go on
Indeed there is something to hold on
For tomorrow when the sun rises comes a new possibility
Of fixing everything and starting off for a better future
While I know I will always live with scars from the abysses
I can find cure for the pains and I have moved on all along
And I'll just have to go on
And I'll just have to go on

(Victoria Park, 10 December 2013)